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You are at:Home » News » Craic » Boris Johnson seeks political asylum in Ireland after Supreme Court ruling
Craic Satire

Boris Johnson seeks political asylum in Ireland after Supreme Court ruling

Gerald LeinsterBy Gerald LeinsterSeptember 24, 2019No Comments2 Mins Read
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Downing Street today confirmed that British Prime Minister Boris Johnson is to seek political asylum from the Irish government.

The announcement was made just as UK Supreme Court ruled that the suspension of Parliament was unlawful.

The surprise announcement has come as quite a shock to not only the British public but is also reported as leaving the Irish government reeling.

As a Downing Street Spokesperson for the soon to be former prime minister said, “Boris is no fool. He can see the writing on the wall — he knows he will probably be the shortest-serving prime minister ever to have held office.”

“I mean,” the spokesperson continued “if the courts don’t jail him or the public doesn’t lynch him Her Majesty the Queen will probably throw him in the Tower for treason.”

“No, honestly the only way out for Boris is to catch a ferry to Ireland and throw himself at the mercy of the Irish immigration service.”

It is believed that the soon to be former prime minister and leader of the Conservative Party feels that he will be welcomed in Ireland with open arms.

“He’s not looking for much,” the spokesperson confirmed. “Just a small little cottage in Connemara would be perfect. There he could eke out a living cutting a bit of turf and doing the odd car-boot sale. And anyway most Connemara men have that wild hair and wilder look in their eyes — I’m sure Boris would fit right in.” She said.

It is believed the soon to be former prime minister initially sought political asylum in France — the French are still laughing at the proposal. 

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This article is satire. Articles in this section are spoof articles which should not be taken as the truth, nor are they are intended to offend. However, if you are offended, please inform us formally via a letter. You can ensure it gets to us by placing it in the nearest recycling bin.

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Gerald Leinster
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Gerald Leinster is one of Ireland's most noteworthy journalists, columnists and commentator on Irish and international issues. Often accused of being more right-wing than Genghis Khan whom he admires greatly, Gerald is an Oxbridge graduate. He has authored many best-selling books including the recent ' The Margaret Thatcher I knew and Loved' and his previous bestseller 'Reagan, Bush, and Trump -- Gods of Their Time.' In his spare time, you might find Gerald relaxing on a golf course in Kildare, watching International rugby or dining out in Dublin's more fashionable restaurants. Although he strives for a professional journalistic apolitical stance, he feels strongly about the reunification of Ireland and the UK. He also holds membership of both Fine Gael and Fianna Fail.

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